Difference between revisions of "Write Better English"
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# We continue by presenting the results of several experiments in which controllers have been designed to allow the sbots to coordinate their actions and autonomously self-assembles so as to perform scenario related tasks. |
# We continue by presenting the results of several experiments in which controllers have been designed to allow the sbots to coordinate their actions and autonomously self-assembles so as to perform scenario related tasks. |
||
#* Yikes! |
#* Yikes! |
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| − | #* => Below, we present the results of several experiments in which sbots carry out tasks related to the scenario. The tasks |
+ | #* => Below, we present the results of several experiments in which sbots carry out tasks related to the scenario. The tasks require the sbots to self-assemble and coordinate their actions. We designed controllers which allowed the sbots to carry out these tasks autonomously. |
| − | # In this |
+ | # In this paper we have presented the results of a project directed at evaluating two particular choices. |
#* Is this sentence about what we have presented, or about what the project was? Too much information crammed into this sentence. Confusing for the reader. |
#* Is this sentence about what we have presented, or about what the project was? Too much information crammed into this sentence. Confusing for the reader. |
||
| − | #* => In this |
+ | #* => In this paper we have presented the results of the SWMB project. The SWMB project was fundamentally about evaluating two particular choices in robotic system design. |
# In order to test the feasibility of the integration of swarm robotics principles for the implementation of self-assembling robots, we defined a set of qualitative and quantitative criteria through the description of the following scenario. |
# In order to test the feasibility of the integration of swarm robotics principles for the implementation of self-assembling robots, we defined a set of qualitative and quantitative criteria through the description of the following scenario. |
||
#* Yikes! |
#* Yikes! |
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#* => We obtained |
#* => We obtained |
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# thus giving an important contribution to the achievement of a fast and reliable reaction to the perception of the hole. |
# thus giving an important contribution to the achievement of a fast and reliable reaction to the perception of the hole. |
||
| + | #* to the... of a... to the... Where is this sentence going? Is it a song? |
||
| − | #* =>thus |
+ | #* =>thus helping to produce a fast and reliable reaction to the perception of the hole |
| − | ;Watch your |
+ | ;Watch your subjects and objects |
# Section 4 starts by introducing. |
# Section 4 starts by introducing. |
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#* Section 4 doesn't introduce anything. We introduce. |
#* Section 4 doesn't introduce anything. We introduce. |
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#* => Researchers in Swarm robotics investigate |
#* => Researchers in Swarm robotics investigate |
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# This technique allows to increase the performance of... |
# This technique allows to increase the performance of... |
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| − | #* |
+ | #* Object missing completely |
#* => This technique allows us to increase the performance of... |
#* => This technique allows us to increase the performance of... |
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;Unreferenced pronouns |
;Unreferenced pronouns |
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# It relies on the emergence of the desired global behaviour starting from the definition of the individual ones. |
# It relies on the emergence of the desired global behaviour starting from the definition of the individual ones. |
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| − | #* 'individual ones' - what is this 'ones' referring to? |
+ | #* 'individual ones' - what is this 'ones' referring to? Unclear. |
#* => The human designer only has to specify the desired global behaviour - the individual agent behaviours that will create this emergent global behaviour are then found by a process of trial and error. |
#* => The human designer only has to specify the desired global behaviour - the individual agent behaviours that will create this emergent global behaviour are then found by a process of trial and error. |
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Latest revision as of 07:37, 1 June 2006
- Short sentences. One thread of thought per sentence. MOST IMPORTANT!!!!!
- We continue by presenting the results of several experiments in which controllers have been designed to allow the sbots to coordinate their actions and autonomously self-assembles so as to perform scenario related tasks.
- Yikes!
- => Below, we present the results of several experiments in which sbots carry out tasks related to the scenario. The tasks require the sbots to self-assemble and coordinate their actions. We designed controllers which allowed the sbots to carry out these tasks autonomously.
- In this paper we have presented the results of a project directed at evaluating two particular choices.
- Is this sentence about what we have presented, or about what the project was? Too much information crammed into this sentence. Confusing for the reader.
- => In this paper we have presented the results of the SWMB project. The SWMB project was fundamentally about evaluating two particular choices in robotic system design.
- In order to test the feasibility of the integration of swarm robotics principles for the implementation of self-assembling robots, we defined a set of qualitative and quantitative criteria through the description of the following scenario.
- Yikes!
- To structure our research, we came up with the following scenario. The scenario consists of a series of tasks to be performed by our robotic system. This provided us with criterea against which we could measure the performance of our system on an ongoing basis.
- Verbiage - don't add words unless they add meaning!
- We managed to obtain
- => We obtained
- thus giving an important contribution to the achievement of a fast and reliable reaction to the perception of the hole.
- to the... of a... to the... Where is this sentence going? Is it a song?
- =>thus helping to produce a fast and reliable reaction to the perception of the hole
- Watch your subjects and objects
- Section 4 starts by introducing.
- Section 4 doesn't introduce anything. We introduce.
- => Section 4 starts with.
- Swarm Robotics investigates ...
- => Researchers in Swarm robotics investigate
- This technique allows to increase the performance of...
- Object missing completely
- => This technique allows us to increase the performance of...
- Unreferenced pronouns
- It relies on the emergence of the desired global behaviour starting from the definition of the individual ones.
- 'individual ones' - what is this 'ones' referring to? Unclear.
- => The human designer only has to specify the desired global behaviour - the individual agent behaviours that will create this emergent global behaviour are then found by a process of trial and error.
